This Is How I Want to Remember Her

writing prompt from FANDANGOS FLASH FICTION CHALLENGE #FFFC

This was how I wanted to remember her.  Even though, at so and so years old, wanting to run off and play.  Freezing for a dozen pictures sounded more like torture than a distant memory that I would cherish.  A memory that I coddle like Teeny the tiny hamster, perched upon my palms.  A moment that I prepared to lunge and grab if it came too close to scurrying away.  I hope that the eye rolls and the whining, while she squinted to get the picture just right translated in some way to “I Love You’s”.  I hope that all the groans and rushing off to someone else translated in some way to “I never want to lose you” and that she knew that I loved her with all my heart.  

As the years passed by, the squinting progressed into an honest inability to see.  Her fingers no longer had the dexterity to push the buttons on that darn camera.  It was too late to teach her to use a smart phone and standing long enough to herd us all together for a picture was practically an impossible feat.  

In less time than I realized, I became the one that wanted to capture every moment together.  I was the one that pushed her to smile for my camera, who recorded all of our adventures, even if it only took place in the comfort of our living room.  

In less time than I realized, the circle of life had made its complete circle.  I was making jokes and tricks to try and get her to eat as much nourishment as possible.  I was changing her soiled clothing.  I was comforting her when she was having a tantrum.  

I loved her even more then.  In all those moments, I realized how unconditional love can really be.  How much of the extra means nothing, when you are focused on the happiness and well being of the people you hold dear.  

But, this  is how I really want to remember her.  Chasing us around to capture a glimpse of our happiness.  The love in her effort.   The care in her intent.  Squinting to get the picture just right.  Standing strong for all of us to remember.  

NEVER SILENCE THE MADNESS POETRY PROMPT “Bête Noir”

A few months ago, I started a book club, on FB called NEVER SILENCE THE MAD READER. As I was reading this particular book, our first book of the club, I realized it had so many large words that I had to look up. This was a very discouraging realization because in high school, I had so much pride in myself for being an avid reader. As an adult, I didn’t get the chance to read as much, but I didn’t think my vocabulary was as limited as it was. By the end of the first book, I chalked it up to the book itself. I mean, it was called “Special Topics in Calamity physics”, what else was I going to expect? 

LOL a bunch of hard words….. 

turns out…. It wasn’t the book, because come Decembers book, and I’m still writing down a long list of words I do not know hahaha 

Anyway, I decided to write poems for each word to help me ingrain the definition into my mind. I thought it would help expand my apparently minuscule pool of vernacular. Once I started doing this, I thought, hey! why not start a poetry group and post poetry prompts, I’m already “prompting” myself, I’ll just share it, and others can join if they want to. 

I started a poetry group on FB called NEVER SILENCE THE MAD POET and I began posting my word of the week or poetry prompts. I recently decided, I’ll try sharing it on here as well and 🙏 would love it if anyone would like to participate and tag their ping backs to #NSTMPP

This weeks poetry prompt will be the word “Bête Noir” 

according to Merriam-webster: 

pingback to #NSTMPP 

I’d love to read your work. 

Love Made Them Foolish, Nonsensical Lunatics 

He was foolish 

.

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He reeked of inexperience 

.

.

Lacked the emotional wherewithal to create something worth while 

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.

But the look in his eyes said he wanted to try 

.

.

The passion in his lips said inexperience in one doesn’t mean inexperience in all 

.

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He was an ASININE excuse for a partner 

.

.

But as a lover, he was a 5 star vacation of a lifetime 

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.

He begged to prove he was more than face value 

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.

Climbed mountains to show he was more than skin deep 

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Ripped open his heart to prove to her that there was even a heart to see 

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She was foolish

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She reeked of a woman with too much experience but a heart too big that none of it mattered

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She lacked the emotional wherewithal to stand by her word 

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But the look in her eyes said she wanted to try 

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The ache in her heart meant she still had enough of one in there for one more heartbreak 

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But she was willing to put that piece of her heart in his hands and trust him not to crush it

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She was an ASININE excuse for a partner 

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.

Because she was all-in with one foot out of the door at every moment

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But as a lover, she was a 5 star vacation of a lifetime 

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.

She begged to prove that she was more than just broken pieces 

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She climbed mountains to show that the glue holding her together was strong enough to carry them both 

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Ripped open her heart to prove to him that there was enough in there to keep on loving

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They were an ASININE excuse for partners 

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Love made them foolish, nonsensical lunatics 

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But as lovers they were a 5 star vacation of a lifetime 

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And at the end of that lifetime, who wouldn’t choose to live it as such?

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In what love story, are there lovers that aren’t foolish, that haven’t lost their senses? 

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In what scenario does love not make you both a little crazy for each other? 

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I truly do not know, but if you ask them, they will tell you…. 

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It is going to be hard, but most things Worth having usually are

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True love, knocks us a little off our senses 

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But at the end of every day you just have to say

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I choose you 

Response to NEVER SILENCE THE MADNESS POETRY PROMPT “ASININE”

The Universe is an IMPLACABLE Thing

With every twist and turn

The world tried to tear them apart 

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Whispers that linger 

Cuts that sting deep

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The unforgiving movement 

That made one nauseated while they sleep

.

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Photographs 

Pyrography etched into ones mind 

.

.

Memories

The reality that there is never really time 

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.

But the universe is an implacable thing 

With it’s mind made up 

There is no real twisting and turning 

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.

Every bump in the road 

Every detour 

Every kink in the path 

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.

What is meant to be 

Will be 

And the universe will handle that 

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She is adamant, relentless 

She is unforgiving when she knows what she wants 

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The universe doesn’t care which way the world tries to turn 

She will spin it backwards and forwards 

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She will linger

She will haunt

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She drowns out the whispers 

Blows on the cuts 

.

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Navigates through the moments 

When we all get a little lost 

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She is an implacable thing 

.

.

And in the end 

She always gets what she wants.   

Response to Never Silence The Madness Poetry Prompt “implacable”

NEVER SILENCE THE MADNESS POETRY PROMPT “Asinine” 

A few months ago, I started a book club, on FB called NEVER SILENCE THE MAD READER. As I was reading this particular book, our first book of the club, I realized it had so many large words that I had to look up. This was a very discouraging realization because in high school, I had so much pride in myself for being an avid reader. As an adult, I didn’t get the chance to read as much, but I didn’t think my vocabulary was as limited as it was. By the end of the first book, I chalked it up to the book itself. I mean, it was called “Special Topics in Calamity physics”, what else was I going to expect? 

LOL a bunch of hard words….. 

turns out…. It wasn’t the book, because come Decembers book, and I’m still writing down a long list of words I do not know hahaha 

Anyway, I decided to write poems for each word to help me ingrain the definition into my mind. I thought it would help expand my apparently minuscule pool of vernacular. Once I started doing this, I thought, hey! why not start a poetry group and post poetry prompts, I’m already “prompting” myself, I’ll just share it, and others can join if they want to. 

I started a poetry group on FB called NEVER SILENCE THE MAD POET and I began posting my word of the week or poetry prompts. I recently decided, I’ll try sharing it on here as well and 🙏 would love it if anyone would like to participate and tag their ping backs to #NSTMPP

This weeks poetry prompt will be the word “Asinine” 

according to Merriam-webster:

1: extremely or utterly foolish or silly an asinine excuse

2: of, relating to, or resembling an ass

pingback to #NSTMPP 

I’d love to read your work. 

NEVER SILENCE THE MADNESS POETRY PROMPT “IMPLACABLE” 

A few months ago, I started a book club, on FB called NEVER SILENCE THE MAD READER. As I was reading this particular book, our first book of the club, I realized it had so many large words that I had to look up. This was a very discouraging realization because in high school, I had so much pride in myself for being an avid reader. As an adult, I didn’t get the chance to read as much, but I didn’t think my vocabulary was as limited as it was. By the end of the first book, I chalked it up to the book itself. I mean, it was called “Special Topics in Calamity physics”, what else was I going to expect? 

LOL a bunch of hard words….. 

turns out…. It wasn’t the book, because come Decembers book, and I’m still writing down a long list of words I do not know hahaha 

Anyway, I decided to write poems for each word to help me engrain the definition into my mind. I thought it would help expand my apparently minuscule pool of vernacular. Once I started doing this, I thought, hey! why not start a poetry group and post poetry prompts, I’m already “prompting” myself, I’ll just share it, and others can join if they want to. 

I started a poetry group on FB called NEVER SILENCE THE MAD POET and I began posting my word of the week or poetry prompts. I recently decided, I’ll try sharing it on here as well and 🙏 would love it if anyone would like to participate and tag their ping backs to #NSTMPP

This weeks poetry prompt will be the word “IMPLACABLE” 

according to Merriam-Webster dictionary :

not placable not capable of being appeased, significantly changed, or mitigated an implacable enemy

1. used to describe (someone who has) strong opinions or feelings that are impossible to change

pingback to #NSTMPP 

I’d love to read your work. 

Never Silence The Madness Poetry Prompt “ERUDITE”

A few months ago, I started a book club, on FB called NEVER SILENCE THE MAD READER. As I was reading this particular book, our first book of the club, I realized it had so many large words that I had to look up. This was a very discouraging realization because in high school, I had so much pride in myself for being an avid reader. As an adult, I didn’t get the chance to read as much, but I didn’t think my vocabulary was as limited as it was. By the end of the first book, I chalked it up to the book itself. I mean, it was called “Special Topics in Calamity physics”, what else was I going to expect?

LOL a bunch of hard words…..

turns out…. It wasn’t the book, because come Decembers book, and I’m still writing down a long list of words I do not know hahaha

Anyway, I decided to write poems for each word to help me engrain the definition into my mind. I thought it would help expand my apparently minuscule pool of vernacular. Once I started doing this, I thought, hey! why not start a poetry group and post poetry prompts, I’m already “prompting” myself, I’ll just share it, and others can join if they want to.

I started a poetry group on FB called NEVER SILENCE THE MAD POET and I began posting my word of the week or poetry prompts. I recently decided, I’ll try sharing it on here as well and 🙏 would love it if anyone would like to participate and tag their ping backs to #NSTMPP

This weeks poetry prompt will be the word “ERUDITE

according to dictionary.com it is an adjective meaning “characterized by great knowledge; learned or scholarly: an erudite professor; an erudite commentary.

pingback to #NSTMPP

I’d love to read your work.

Hollow Smiles

I watched you glow as he fed you 

Abdomen engorged 

Promises; candy coated words 

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He fattened you up 

Rosie cheeked 

Arms stuffed full of flower petals 

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Honey vibrato 

To ingratiate himself with your pitter patter heart 

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He molded himself into every dream you ever wished for 

He decapitated every monster you ever lived  with 

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He woke you from your nightmare 

And he gave you something to live for 

.

.

Why then, do you start to feel like something is still missing? 

Like promises are empty 

Smiles hollow 

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Why then, is there no warmth between your fingertips 

Or fire in your soul ?

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.

In the end, 

You do not know 

.

.

In the end, 

You have to let the the dream of him go 

.

#NSTMPP

NEVERSILENCETHEMADNESS POETRY PROMPT

Delusions of Grandeur

With empty eyes 

And a hollow heart 

You looked at me that night 

.

.

You said goodbye 

With your chest puffed up

Above my line of sight 

.

.

Peering down 

It’s plain as day to see 

You move with an air of confidence

Arrogance 

Far far better than me

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.

Their whispers became Screams 

Deep within your head 

The nagging echos 

Did not allow you to rest 

.

.

You thrust your megalomaniacal words 

In my face 

You run away

Without haste

.

.

My heart

Was never dear to your soul 

And I realized 

At that moment 

I meant nothing to you anymore 

.

.

Falling Toward a Ground that was Never Meant to Catch You

They say my head is in the clouds 

Why? 

I dream too much? 

I think too highly of myself? 

My judgment is cloudy?

.

.

.

They say to get my head out of the clouds

Why? 

Envious of the extent in which I dream? 

Of the height I allow myself to fall from? 

Because I know that I will survive 

And I will get right back up.

.

.

.

I look above me 

How soft a place to lay upon 

Angelic 

Serene 

Spiritual 

.

.

.

I can see the castles 

From just right here

Peaking 

Hiding 

Real 

.

.

.

Once I have climbed all I can climb

Hoisted above the greatest arena 

I look below me 

And I see them 

.

.

.

It is the most joyous first couple steps 

It is the bottomless hug I never knew I needed 

It is the cool condensation on a heatwave of a day 

It is the insulation on a chilly night 

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.

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It is the infinity fall 

From a ground that was never meant to catch you 

It is your stomach flying out of your chest 

It is watching everything you hold dearly

Become engulfed in the comfort 

Or released in the mayhem 

.

.

.

I can see the castles from here

I can hear the trumpets playing 

And the angels singing 

I am not afraid of the fall 

Because I know you are near me 

Stunned at Your Vacuity

We spent the night together 

Wrapped in each other’s arms 

We tumbled through the universe 

Kept each other warm 

.

.

.

We melded together 

Until our skin became one 

And when we relaxed under the stars

Our breath sang songs until the sun 

.

.

.

In the morning 

I starred deeply into your eyes

All the sight

Your sight 

To see 

.

.

.

You opened your mouth to speak 

And I was stunned 

At your vacuity 

.

.

.

Caught between 

Should I stay 

Or should I go ?

.

.

.

Should I pick 

My shame up off the floor ?

.

.

.

Or should I give in

To my body 

Wanting more?

.

.

.

Could I have a future 

With one so vacuous ? 

.

.

.

To what extent 

Do thoughts and words fulfill us ? 

.

.

.

As I painfully kiss 

Those lips goodbye 

.

.

.

My heart still aches 

The painful truth

I cannot hide

*VACUITY poetry prompt

It’s Where Your Compass Leads You

You said you dreamt of it once 

.

.

a freckle 

.

.

Like a kiss upon her thigh 

.

.

It’s where all the roads are traveled 

It’s where your compass leads you 

.

.

It’s where the time goes 

When it flies by 

,

,

It winks at you 

.

.

like a LANDMARK 

To lead you home 

.

.

And once you have landed 

It’s a lovely place to rest your head upon 

.

.

#FOWC “landmark”

Back To A Time

sifting through a box of old things

Book after book

pamphlet after pamphlet 

treatise on anxiety and depression 

.

.

.

I am brought back to a time 

when our lives were dictated by school bells 

And seating charts 

.

.

.

Where one rumor 

Became our entire world 

And one heartbreak 

Was announced through 

The speaker hung walls 

.

.

.

ages ago

An entire world away 

.

.

.

I pack it back up 

to look back at another day 

.

.

.

Weekly prompt @ NSTMP

I Can’t Be Mad At You

I can’t be mad at you

You stole my heart 

You tricked me 

.

.

.

I can’t be mad at you 

I walked toward you with a veil over my eyes 

You led me blindly 

You robbed me 

.

.

.

And I let you 

.

.

.

How can I be mad at you ?

.

.

.

.

You thief 

.

.

.

Burglar

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.

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Pirate 

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.

.

Swindler 

.

.

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You stole my heart 

Right from my chest 

.

.

.

And I liked it

.

.

.

#FOWC “thief”

2020

When I met you 

Early on 

You filled with me with so much hope 

We dreamt together 

About our future 

About our goals 

Where this life would lead us 

All the paths  we could take

The possibilities endless 

But you turned on me 

Devious 

Maniacal 

Sadistic 

You stole all my desires 

And locked me within my own four walls 

alienated me 

Placed me in solitary confinement 

Watched me squirm in discomfort 

As you sick my biggest fears upon me

A jungle being set loose within my streets 

A buzz so loud 

What sounds like inches from my ear

hoovers 50 ft away

You, maniac

I cannot contain you 

all the vulnerable are dying 

All  the apparent strong,

Are falling to their knees 

When I first met you

You made me feel hopeful 

But you tore through me

Wild and dangerous 

and I stand here speechless 

#FOWC “maniac”

A World Surrounded Her That Was Always Somehow Unreachable

I looked her in the eye 

And I told her how amazing she was

I told her she was beautiful 

I told her she was special 

All she heard was 

Her face lacked angles 

All she felt

was the way her tears fell from her eyes 

At any hint of emotion  

How she always gave more than she got in return 

All she digested was how a world surrounded her 

That was always somehow unreachable 

I felt her heart in her chest

Palpitating 

From the fear and anxiety 

of her reality

I hugged her close

I knew where the hurt stemmed from 

I knew the doubt 

The worst feeling 

Is to be ambivalent about oneself 

To look at yourself in the mirror 

to stare into your own eyes 

and in the same breath

See the queen you are 

And look away in disgust 

#FOWC word of the day “ambivalent”

A Few Words I Know I’ll Never Hear

writing prompt from HITRECORD : A Few Things I Needed to Hear… From You

I am sorry that I hated you 

through your innocence 

Every move you made

Irked me to my core 

And I had to make you feel it 

I am sorry 

I am sorry that I made him choose me

When he should have chosen us 

But I made sure that you were never apart 

Of this whole

And I am so sorry 

I did everything I could to break you

Hinder you

Demolish you 

Shrink you 

I was wrong

And I am sorry. 

On Most Days

On most days

She wakes up hours before I do

She jumps on my chest

Searing pain

Breathless 

On most days

I’m too tired to take her to the park

She barks at me 

Begging 

“I’m boooored” 

I can hear her thinking 

On most days 

I know she deserves more 

She looks at me

She tilts her head 

All the leverage she has on me 

She cuddles 

She wants to be loved

And I know I have to be the best me 

So that I can be the best for her

#FOWC word of the day “leverage”

That Much I Know

With so much unknown in the world today

There is an abundance of 

Fear

Sadness

Confusion

With a reality so new to us 

There is an overflowing amount of 

Resistance

Question

Panic 

The FACT of the matter is

despite what anyone says

There is definite 

Loss 

Loss of what life once was

Loss of loved ones 

Loss of stability 

From that, we have so much to

Gain

compassion

Unity

Love 

Out of everything I know right now

It’s that.

#FOWC “fact”

Green With Envy

They do not know I see them

I spy on them, green with envy

As I cling on to the ledge

Heavy with the burden  and no ground to land on

All my strength just so that I could see, everything unattainable to me.

Write a story or poem of 5 Lines or Less
Use the picture and/or the word spy as inspiration

Image by alexis parra from Pixabay

This Fickle Heart Of Mine

The first thing that came to mind 

When reading the word VAULT

Was the inner workings of my heart 

Code to crack 

Difficult to get in

Thick walls 

But nearly indestructible 

My vault of a heart 

Holds all my deepest secrets 

All my memories 

All my pain 

Sometimes it’s 

Stronger than it’s own good 

Barring the storm 

keeping out the insane

This heart of mine 

Can be tricky 

Confusing 

Fickle 

But it loves with the strength 

Of the strongest metal

and once you get in

You are 

Golden 

Word of the day challenge : VAULT

Isn’t It Curious

The universe tends to work in very mysterious ways 

Breadcrumbs 

nudges 

Whispers 

To the right direction 

Sometimes it is the direction we desire 

Sometimes it’s in the direction that breaks your heart 

But it is very curious 

The way that the universe tends to work 

When we ask it

For answers 

#Fandango’s One Word Challenge : CURIOUS

The Thorns On My Salvation

They walk past me with mournful eyes

Shaking their heads in disappointment

“Why do you hold on so tight? 

The thorns piercing your skin? 

Your blood dripping so bright?”

They do not understand

There is no need to die 

Giving them my last breath 

As I lay him down

Tuck him in 

And shower him with light 

I watch him bloom

I watch him grow

And I know 

He is a keeper 

Word of the day challange : keeper

Meanwhile

Every morning

the sun would rise 

Every morning 

That sun rose with pride 

Boasting in his brightness 

Full and larger than life 

He thought to himself 

“Every night, they are saddened with darkness, 

Every morning, they need me to light their way, 

I am what they wait for as their head touches their pillow,

My absence is what they dread as the day passes by” 

As 12 O’clock approaches he inflates to take up as much of the sky as he can

It is not to be egotistical 

He does not shine bright because he thinks he is the center of the universe 

O’ sun 

All he feels is joy 

The assumption that he is all we need to survive 

He doesn’t realize that 

Meanwhile 

As he stands tall 

As he holds strong 

Some of us wilt 

Some of us dry 

Some of us fall beneath the light 

And some of us die

#FOWC : MEANWHILE

A Flowered Crown Upon My Head

Walking along the stoney path

Fingers grazing the brick bridge wall 

I hear her humming 

The most feminine tune 

And I wonder what beauty I might befall 

I peer across

O’ I am so lucky to see 

And angel prancing along the meadow 

But then she stops to look at me 

The heat within me rises 

Feeling caught 

Red handed 

Warm

Like a peeping tom

I am guilty 

an eye 

Gazing 

Upon her storm 

She stands before me gawking 

I prepare for a slap across my cheek 

And then gently she places a flowered crown upon my head 

And curtseys in front of me 

Bewildered

I don’t understand why she stays so kind 

All she does is smile 

What a lucky lucky day this is 

Of mine 

Underneath the Billowing Sea

Sitting upon the dock one day
I stared out into the ocean

Deep blue waters
Swelling with each wave

And appeared such a notion

The fear of what is down there
Underneath the billowing sea

The fear of what is buried, deep inside of me

What creatures linger ?
What monsters hide ?

As I cry my tears into the brine

What may jump out as the waves flux in ?
Flux out?

What secrets lie in that sharp-toothed mouth?

As I stare forward into the offing
See the tide rise
And rise

I think about the ways
I am like the ocean
About the deep things
That I hide inside

I think about how the current washes up
The undesirables

And the depth
renders them untouchable

they feed and they grow

yet they lay dormant

undetectable

Sitting upon the dock that day, I feel the waves rock me

to and fro

I wonder what the ocean thinks of me

knowing all I know

All Of A Sudden I Hear Your Voice

Flipping through the stationary pictures
Smelling the dress you left behind
Reading the words you left on paper
Collecting the scraps of what is left of you

All of a sudden I hear your voice
Radiating from the pinpoint speakers of my phone

I hear your laughter

I hear you giggle

Tears streamed from my eyes

But I must say

It was such a

Treat

 

Fandago’s One Word Challenge

#FOWC

#Treat

 

Uncompromising

via The Daily Post: Uncompromising

You

Faceless joker

Hooded creature

You

Core laugher

Ice cold hugger

You

Uncompromising dealer

Indian giver

I said I want to make you a deal

Give her more time

You can have mine

Do not walk away from me

Eyeless sockets

Do not look away from my glare

You are not free from handicap

I see you do not glide like history portrays you

The scythe you carry

Brings fear to those

whose clock chimes

It’s time to meet you

I see

It is not a weapon

It is your aid

You are not free from decline and decay

You

Faceless joker

It is not a joke to me

Deal I said

Just compromise

I beg you

Don’t take her from me

You

Hooded creature

Heartless monster

Uncompromising dealer

I said

I want to make a deal

Fact

Fact : daily word prompt

You awoken the fire inside of me – FACT

 

You lifted me higher than I had ever been – FACT

 

I had never felt more beautiful than when I was in your arms – FACT

 

And yet

 

You broke me – FACT

 

You didn’t just not catch me when I fell

You dropped me – FACT

 

You reminded me that I was fire

And then made me feel as though

That fire just wasn’t enough – FACT

 

But amidst the flames

The soot

The smoke

 

I was reborn – FACT

 

And I love the person you reminded me that I am

 

—- FACT

Puzzled – one word prompt

I watch him

As he leaves you Puzzled

When together

I glare with a little envy

The way he caresses your face

The way he holds your hand

Appearing as though he is the luckiest man in the world

Kisses as though he needs you

Guides you as though he wants to protect you from harm

But the spin of the earth around the sun

And he transforms

Like a werewolf on a full moon

His voice

Bellowing

Sharp as knives to hurt you

Spits like daggers

Piercing words to break your heart

Speaks as though he’s okay with a life without you

It doesn’t matter if he sleeps alone

He doesn’t care who hurts you

His puzzled heart loves

No one