Whispers fill the room I can visualize it Like the notes on sheet music Flowing through Singing tune . . It’s like a little seed planted in my heart Fertilized by anxiety And the palpitations start . . I cannot unsee What I think I have seen . . Befell The horror stories on my... Continue Reading →
With empty eyes And a hollow heart You looked at me that night . . You said goodbye With your chest puffed up Above my line of sight . . Peering down It’s plain as day to see You move with an air of confidence Arrogance Far far better than me . . Their whispers... Continue Reading →
They say my head is in the clouds Why? I dream too much? I think too highly of myself? My judgment is cloudy? . . . They say to get my head out of the clouds Why? Envious of the extent in which I dream? Of the height I allow myself to fall from? Because... Continue Reading →
So, a few weeks ago, I had a dream about my mom for the first time in a while. There wasn't a storyline, just a bunch of flashes. Random scenes and a general overall feeling of panic. The entire dream, all I felt was dread. I had no idea why I hadn't talked to my... Continue Reading →
Today, I was honored to be presented with the DAISY award at my job. It is an award to thank nurses for their compassion and skill. You are nominated by patients, their family members, staff, or anyone that experiences or observes your extraordinary compassionate care. I received a beautiful bouquet, A hand carved statue called... Continue Reading →
We spent the night together Wrapped in each other’s arms We tumbled through the universe Kept each other warm . . . We melded together Until our skin became one And when we relaxed under the stars Our breath sang songs until the sun . . . In the morning I starred deeply into your... Continue Reading →
I can trace back the memories Like a roadmap of my life . . . Each pit stop A part of my undoing . . . Each rest stop A natural high . . . You ask me not to look back At the hurt I have been caused . . . But each landmark ... Continue Reading →
I looked out into the world And I saw it . . . We are all main characters in our own books . . . I couldn’t unsee what I had seen All of us walking around with pages and chapters . . . With bookmarks to save the important parts . . . With... Continue Reading →
She told him . . “I want nothing I am ninety-one Please let me go” . . He looked at her solemnly . . “Don’t make me do this, No” . . She took his hand and said . . “I lost the greatest love of my life ten years ago And I have loved... Continue Reading →
Sometimes I feel so stifled Frozen And unseen . . I lay awake at night Pondering ... What does it all mean?
I spoke to her in awe In her seasoned age she had no flaws . . With her lipstick placed Her nails bright red And her night cap made of lace . . She regaled on her love of dance her family and her lows . . She sang of all the ways She loved... Continue Reading →
As I walk through the threshold I am assaulted by the sight . . The smells pummel through me The energy as dark as night . . Screams heard from every corner Howls of despair the wailing of fear . . A man crying over limbs that should still be there . . A woman... Continue Reading →
I ran to him . . “Are you okay?” . . his expression brightened up like the sun . . “I want to go dancing” . . He smiles . . And I laugh to join the fun . . Tomorrow I heard you are no longer speaking . . Your breath was taken from... Continue Reading →
I saw the way you looked at him -Enamored . . Like he was the one that broke the mould . . you loved him With appreciation . . He was Midas And you wanted to live surrounded by his gold . . I saw the way he looked at you -Enamored . . He... Continue Reading →
As the stars turn above us, Your head upon my chest. Your skin pressed against mine Our bodies made to rest . . I lose the line between who we are Because Who are you ? And who is she ? As the stars turn above us Is it really important? The “who are we?”... Continue Reading →
She loved until she lost herself She gave until she was empty She hung on until her fingers bled And her hourglass was hungry . . She was an inveterate long time lover each chapter in her life sewn together neatly between each love . . Never knowing how to say goodbye Never knowing when... Continue Reading →
You said you dreamt of it once . . a freckle . . Like a kiss upon her thigh . . It’s where all the roads are traveled It’s where your compass leads you . . It’s where the time goes When it flies by , , It winks at you . . like a... Continue Reading →
When our hands touch I am awakened . . Our fingertips The bridge between our souls . . Blood flowing Vibrating with electricity . . Tantalizing Brewing , A potion that cannot be undone . . Because I want you more today than yesterday And I know I’ll still want you more when the day... Continue Reading →
They asked you for help . . With their silent eyes They called for you In their muted tears They screamed for you to see them . . Where were you, then? . . Making choices for “their best interests” Not caring when they told you They felt helpless . . I’m sorry children You... Continue Reading →
I have been through a war Bullets flying pass my face Tip toeing around the grenades . . I lived through the smoke bounded by chains . . I have been through it all Fighting for equality Fighting for freedom Fighting for life . . I’ve lived through the protests I marched for theirs Like... Continue Reading →
I saw the hate in your eyes It was clear as day . . The disregard for a life That you will soon take away . . No cries from the helpless Found its way into your soul? . . No tears from the defenseless Made you want to make a different call? . .... Continue Reading →
What we meant to each other Was something much larger than us . . . It was hopes And dreams . . . It was goals And love . . . It was fear And disappointment . . . It was longing It was loss . . . I will always remember the way your... Continue Reading →
sifting through a box of old things Book after book pamphlet after pamphlet treatise on anxiety and depression . . . I am brought back to a time when our lives were dictated by school bells And seating charts . . . Where one rumor Became our entire world And one heartbreak Was announced through ... Continue Reading →
I can’t be mad at you You stole my heart You tricked me . . . I can’t be mad at you I walked toward you with a veil over my eyes You led me blindly You robbed me . . . And I let you . . . How can I be mad at... Continue Reading →
I read somewhere That you were no longer mine . . That you finally opened up your heart And honestly, It was about time . . I read somewhere That you no longer belonged to me . . That our memories Are no longer cherished It’s not my heart that holds your key . .... Continue Reading →
I saw her scars Evidence of a life Where great just wasn’t good enough Where She was always just one nip away from perfect One tuck away from perfection One stitch away from happiness I saw her eyes of desperation As she picked at things I could not see Although I was happy to oblige ... Continue Reading →
Sometimes My brain thinks so much My heart worries so much I wish I could step away from it all.... And breathe
I wish I could make it stop I do It’s like Playing jenga Trying to figure out the puzzle when it was already whole to begin with Every piece A clue that I must pull out and dissect poking holes through my own logic Seeing through my own thoughts Piling on top of each other ... Continue Reading →
With all my heart I want you in my life forever I want you there to rock me when I’m sick I want you there, for me to cradle when you’re lonely. I want forever with you I want always with you I want your laugh And your anxiety I have endless questions And I... Continue Reading →
You arent my type You are bland to my taste buds You are too clear Too obvious Too transparent I read you like crystal You just aren’t my type You, tall glass of refreshment Meant to quench my thirst Hydrate my dry desert skin But I do not trust you Or maybe, I trust you... Continue Reading →
He looked at me while I spoke Eyes burning into my own Not an empty gaze But strong, with intent I knew the words coming from my mouth were nonsense The topic, trivial Just one of those conversations that Quite honestly, Could have never happened And it wouldn’t have changed a thing in the world ... Continue Reading →
When I met you Early on You filled with me with so much hope We dreamt together About our future About our goals Where this life would lead us All the paths we could take The possibilities endless But you turned on me Devious Maniacal Sadistic You stole all my desires And locked me within... Continue Reading →
I looked her in the eye And I told her how amazing she was I told her she was beautiful I told her she was special All she heard was Her face lacked angles All she felt was the way her tears fell from her eyes At any hint of emotion How she always... Continue Reading →
I hear the “pitter-patter” Of the rain outside Not long ago The sun Stared with an intensity Of a loyal wife Who has laid eyes on her husband Being a tad less than that How labile this world is I curse it But then I see a reflection of myself For I am the sun... Continue Reading →
writing prompt from HITRECORD : A Few Things I Needed to Hear... From You I am sorry that I hated you through your innocence Every move you made Irked me to my core And I had to make you feel it I am sorry I am sorry that I made him choose me When he... Continue Reading →
It smelled of musty air Saturated in salt Surrounded by unparalleled darkness I knew blindly that there was an ocean beside me Filled with life Housing a world we barely have knowledge of I catch a glimpse Like a flashlight Offering a gift The waves crash upon each other Beautifully dangerous Unabashedly uncaring I’m... Continue Reading →
On most days She wakes up hours before I do She jumps on my chest Searing pain Breathless On most days I’m too tired to take her to the park She barks at me Begging “I’m boooored” I can hear her thinking On most days I know she deserves more She looks at me She... Continue Reading →
I remember what it felt like To laugh with you To watch your face turn red laughing so hard You couldn’t breathe I remember laughing with you All my muscles go weak falling to the floor You just got me Conversations with you Were like portals into my own mind The sincerity of our confidence... Continue Reading →
With so much unknown in the world today There is an abundance of Fear Sadness Confusion With a reality so new to us There is an overflowing amount of Resistance Question Panic The FACT of the matter is despite what anyone says There is definite Loss Loss of what life once was Loss of loved... Continue Reading →
How ominous this random solitary toaster at the end of a very dark road causing me to hesitate Forebodingly It stares at me Daring me To come into the darkness I cannot look away I cannot take a step As if a coyote were in it’s place How ominous This solitary toaster Sitting at the... Continue Reading →
Sometimes She wants to scream Scream so loud The ghosts from her past Hear and cower But All she can do Is whisper Salty tears into a towel Late at night Muffling her deafening cries so she doesn’t wake the neighbors She shakes from the anger She suffocates from the sadness Each nostril plugged by... Continue Reading →
They do not know I see them I spy on them, green with envy As I cling on to the ledge Heavy with the burden and no ground to land on All my strength just so that I could see, everything unattainable to me. Write a story or poem of 5 Lines or Less Use the picture and/or the word spy as... Continue Reading →
She says it’s confidential She says it’s confrontational I probably shouldn’t say this She wouldn’t want me to But who cares She’s filled to the brim with anger It is squeezing out of every seam Orafices Dripping Like an addict She’s trembling What does it all mean? She loves with all her heart But she... Continue Reading →
She is a speck In a world of almost 8 billion people She sees us all like fireflies Her light Flickering Light bulb on the verge of burning out Struggling to emanate the bright Surrounded by the darkness of the night But here she still is , GLOWING
She touched your hand And your anger faded away She hugged you And you melted But like the sun on a nightwalkers skin Ashes to ashes You died from within You felt her like the sun A warmth you hadn’t felt in years She embodied hope But she also embodied all your fears A chain... Continue Reading →
The first thing that came to mind When reading the word VAULT Was the inner workings of my heart Code to crack Difficult to get in Thick walls But nearly indestructible My vault of a heart Holds all my deepest secrets All my memories All my pain Sometimes it’s Stronger than it’s own good Barring... Continue Reading →
The universe tends to work in very mysterious ways Breadcrumbs nudges Whispers To the right direction Sometimes it is the direction we desire Sometimes it’s in the direction that breaks your heart But it is very curious The way that the universe tends to work When we ask it For answers #Fandango's One Word Challenge... Continue Reading →
They walk past me with mournful eyes Shaking their heads in disappointment “Why do you hold on so tight? The thorns piercing your skin? Your blood dripping so bright?” They do not understand There is no need to die Giving them my last breath As I lay him down Tuck him in And shower him... Continue Reading →
Every morning the sun would rise Every morning That sun rose with pride Boasting in his brightness Full and larger than life He thought to himself “Every night, they are saddened with darkness, Every morning, they need me to light their way, I am what they wait for as their head touches their pillow, My... Continue Reading →
Walking along the stoney path Fingers grazing the brick bridge wall I hear her humming The most feminine tune And I wonder what beauty I might befall I peer across O’ I am so lucky to see And angel prancing along the meadow But then she stops to look at me The heat within me... Continue Reading →
She barreled through your life Like a stampede She dismantled all your walls You fought to keep her out But she saw through that facade She made you uncomfortable She made you question She made it hard for you to breathe She tore through your life And made you want to leave You opened your... Continue Reading →
He said to me “You are being explosive ” Little did he know, There was a tornado inside me that I was holding back from being released. He said to me “You are teetering on the edge” Little did he know, I tip-toed the tight-walk for miles before I got here He doesn’t know I... Continue Reading →
My hands are your hands In the daintiness that they lay In the chubbiness that our fingers sit In the thickness that our nails grow Your hands are my hands In the way that you snap your fingers as you dance And flip your long hair And twirl your rings My hands are your hands ... Continue Reading →
"We can comprehend your hurt, but we can also be your rock, because we have already faced a million thunderstorms within us and we know how to stand strong. "
"It is basically the equivalent of a hummingbird sized mosquito. Or if a hummingbird and a mosquito hybrid existed, this monster was it."
Dear Mother, There are so many things that I still wanted to do with you. We always talked about more dances together. We have gone out dancing together twice in our lives. I thought we had so many more late nights left to go. We joked about loving dancing so much, we would go out,... Continue Reading →
The funny thing, or not so funny thing, about our perception of beauty towards others and towards ourselves, is that they are on completely different scales. I run around all day seeing the beauty in other women. I hear their insecurities, but think how there is no need for the harsh words they tell themselves. ... Continue Reading →
After losing my mom, I was flooded with messages from friends and family sending their love and condolences. I found myself finding solace in talking about what happened. In random conversation, I would start to talk about my loss, to anyone close enough to listen. Coworkers in the break room, friends on social media, any... Continue Reading →
I love that I think of you In the moments that I am the most myself In the moments that I am the most bare In the moments that I am just me You pop into my mind I love that I think of you In the moments that I am so passionate When I... Continue Reading →
"... it's that loving yourself is the first thing that you need to accomplish before you could even dream of being happy. You need to love yourself to be the best version of you for the people you care about..."
So, use the time you have together to love each other. Make the time to visit, make the time to call, tell the people you love them when you get the chance.
Sometimes I look out into the city And I feel so immensely small
Sitting upon the dock one day I stared out into the ocean Deep blue waters Swelling with each wave And appeared such a notion The fear of what is down there Underneath the billowing sea The fear of what is buried, deep inside of me What creatures linger ? What monsters hide ? As I... Continue Reading →
Odd that it seems like a place of perfection Empty valley Like a cave within the ground High walls made of grass Sun touching every surface Except the one place right in the middle One tree Providing much needed protection from the light I want to lay there I want to lay there all day... Continue Reading →
" ...there will finally be that moment where you triumph over the hardships......"
I still battle every picture to feel beautiful. I still feel insecure without make up. I still like a filter or two. But, at least it is still me. Not a dog Not a unicorn Not some mystical mermaid One day I will beat this battle to feel BEAUTIFUL enough for a picture. I will be Bare faced and beautiful I will be flaws and all beautiful I will amazon warrior this battle to feel beautiful And I will be proud of it.
When you saw the world as beautiful then watched it tear right down the seams Nothing is ever as beautiful As you hoped for it to be
She said your name yesterday I had forgotten about the good days Four years had already passed I didn’t think of us much Memories were filtered by my teeth As I vented back then about the days my heart broke The disgusting taste that was left on my tongue As I flossed the plaque away... Continue Reading →
This wasn’t her first time She knew what she was doing to herself What she didn’t know was what she was doing to the ones around her She looked back at a text message “I can’t do this anymore” Unrecognizable She asks “Did I write this? When?!” He tells her “Right before” He tried to... Continue Reading →
I want to highlight this exceptional woman. She is superwoman. She just started her blog, and every post has been honest and raw. She is a fellow anxiety survivor. She is a mom sharing her journey. She has blown me away and I want you to be able to love and appreciate her as well.
“Ugh, there you go crying again.”
“I’m tired and I don’t care.”
“Leave me alone stop talking to me, I have work in the morning and I don’t wana hear it.”
“Your a cry baby, full of drama, everyone says it, everyone talks about it.”
“There you go again saying crazy stuff that doesn’t make sense”
“IT’S YOUR FAULT YOU DO THIS ON YOUR OWN!”
“I DONT CARE!”
“You choose to argue, you choose to act crazy”
“You just want to pick a fight”
“Ughhhhhh leave me alone and don’t bother texting me tomorrow apologizing”
“You choose to be like this”
“What do you want!”
“Stop yelling and leave me alone”
“Your fine”
“Take your pills”
“Relax”
“Go lay down”
“Go to you mom’s house and cry to your parents”
I’m sorry I don’t know how to unload my anxiety
I’m sorry I want to Express myself so my chest…
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I received this message this morning as I woke up and the feeling of constant dread that I have had since taking my NCLEX suddenly faded away. This journey to my RN has been an extremely long one. Not just the prerequisite classes that I was taking in my early twenties, but from the beginning... Continue Reading →
For those of you that don’t know what the NCLEX is, it is a giant test that stands between you and your dream of being a nurse. It is a test to verify that you have enough knowledge in that pretty little noggin’ of yours to provide safe and quality care to your patients. It... Continue Reading →
How do I feel whole When my heart is scattered? Scattered along the paths I've walked Like breadcrumbs to remind me of my journey I can look behind me And see the pieces of my heart The pieces that are too far to see I can feel Like a sonar... Continue Reading →
He looks at me But he does not see me He sees through me But not to my soul his eyes Dark Black Lost They dart from corner to corner Not sure of where he is Not sure of who he is They pass judgment on you and I am so sorry They tell me... Continue Reading →
I wonder sometimes How you smile throughout the day As you live in your façade Preaching for others to live their life As you flaunt yours But Do not forget that I know What lies beneath your skin I know the creature being held back By your dental veneer jail cell The beautiful smile you... Continue Reading →
Flipping through the stationary pictures Smelling the dress you left behind Reading the words you left on paper Collecting the scraps of what is left of you All of a sudden I hear your voice Radiating from the pinpoint speakers of my phone I hear your laughter I hear you giggle Tears streamed from my... Continue Reading →
"Masochist!" you scream It’s the only definition you could think of For the reason she stays there, Unmoved "Must be some kind of pleasure she gets" You think, "to be teased as she does" You watch her Looking up at the dreams she has built Heart growing with each pump Practically glowing from her chest... Continue Reading →
Those moments reappear at times the most unexpected -Driving -Singing Like being hit by a semi Heart drops Tear drops Pit in my stomach Where it seems my heart Has found a new home She likes to find herself On this trampoline That feeling Flying And the loss of ground while falling Up Down Up... Continue Reading →
Finally unpacking my life from April Going through the nik-naks Smelling your favorite dress With no hint of you left on it Just the aroma of packing boxes Hint of dust Filtering among the cherished And the heartbroken Pictures that I saw the day we laid you... Continue Reading →
"she was my best friend, nobody knew me down to the depths of my soul like she did and no one knew her as much as I did. If she came to visit me after death, I would know. If she wanted me to know something, she would find a way to tell me. If she wanted to be near me, I would feel her. There is no possible way that her spirit could be near me without me knowing."
Forgive me LORD I do not think I have truly prayed to you Since the day that you took her home It is not for lack of love It is not for lack of want It is not for gain of hatred It is not for gain of loss Maybe I am not... Continue Reading →
Maybe I'll take a page out of your story mother It was beautiful when you played it out in my head Green backdrop Sun shining The smell of pine Or maybe forest The smell of bark Aroma of nature Because you were a wild woman That wanted to be set free Surrounded by... Continue Reading →
In one phone call, my world came colliding down "she will miss you" - he said As a crackle in his voice slipped through the telephone waves Thousands of miles away That heartbreak only took a millisecond to deliver Even at that moment I felt emptiness Yet disbelief There is no way that the fire... Continue Reading →
A picture Does not give justice To what the eyes can see The sparkles of the life below The blackness of the sea Each lantern A life that I could never know The sun set sky Vast in darkness Allowing the life of night Glow I want to capture this beauty Show you Somehow explain... Continue Reading →
Its funny the way he treats me like treasure As if he is blown away that I am even in his possession As if Someone might try and steal me away at any moment As if I may be made of gold He jokes As if I fight away wolves on... Continue Reading →
I know it was just an Ice cream cake But it really was so much more It was the evisceration of all the sadness Spanning two failed relationships sitting within my gut It was the eradication of ten years worth of broken promises It was the first heartbeat that knew that... Continue Reading →
Somewhere deep inside of me There is a glimmer of hope A spark of life An anchor Keeping me grounded Just to you Somewhere deep inside of me Under years of confusion Beneath the rubble of many long fought wars Buried within the ashes of the reborn phoenix As it bursts into flames and... Continue Reading →
in a state of limbo during a time when I experienced the most change picking up my entire life for a new one Molding me into a robot working toward growth and improvement yet stagnant in life not wanting to let go because letting go means goodbye Because in one word, a whole life is... Continue Reading →
What is it that haunts you, boy ? The acid that you spit from between your teeth The venom you conjure within your bowels Created by the hatred that you boil within Waiting for your top to explode What is it that is paining you, boy? I see between the hateful words that you spew... Continue Reading →
via The Daily Post: Uncompromising You Faceless joker Hooded creature You Core laugher Ice cold hugger You Uncompromising dealer Indian giver I said I want to make you a deal Give her more time You can have mine Do not walk away from me Eyeless sockets Do not look away from my glare You are... Continue Reading →
Fact : daily word prompt You awoken the fire inside of me - FACT You lifted me higher than I had ever been - FACT I had never felt more beautiful than when I was in your arms - FACT And yet You broke me - FACT You didn't just... Continue Reading →
I hear the crack in her voice when she calls The happiness to hear me speak And the instant regret that I answered Because she will never see me again She rushes off to say "I love you" And hangs up the phone I am already in tears by the time I say... Continue Reading →
I watch him As he leaves you Puzzled When together I glare with a little envy The way he caresses your face The way he holds your hand Appearing as though he is the luckiest man in the world Kisses as though he needs you Guides you as though he wants to protect you from... Continue Reading →
An introvert in all aspects But a fire in my heart I love to sit within the madness Watch in utter calmness All the while A storm brews around me Chaos within all four corners Hectic vibrations And some how It creates a tunnel for me to focus Like the noise forms a bubble in... Continue Reading →
All I ask Is that when I am in my darkest hour You remain my light When I have no words For what aches inside me And tears fall without reason Don't turn to anger Don't question my love for you My love for you does not wane But All I ask Is that when... Continue Reading →
You are the coffee to my anxiety You Syrupy sweet Masked by the product that brings most life Awakening aroma You Are exactly what I need To pick me up When I am dragging on the ground Yet you Bring on the palpitations You Give me a pit in my stomach Maybe butterflies Maybe fear... Continue Reading →
Sea cliff, next exit, it said And She thought .... cliff .... “I can jump off one of those”
As he asked her for help I knew it wasn't easy Pride aside Ego tucked in But she couldn't bother to Look up The selfish way that she rushed to finish her laundry Earbuds in No worry about the pain in another man's heart No worry about the confusion and embarrassment As he stared at... Continue Reading →
I'm not sure why, but, no matter what I am feeling, seeing the crescent moon in the sky brings me peace.
School is finally out at least until February and a lot of things have been on my mind. A friend of mine made a comment to me that with school over, now I have time to de-stress …. And somehow .. I am even more stressed, and this is what I have concluded as to... Continue Reading →
To the girl I met today,
I want you to know,
that I feel your torment.
In the way that you evade my eyes
in the way that your eyes gloss over
with the pink tinge of a girl that has cried
from the full of the moon
till it blessed us with its smile.
I know you are hurt.
I want you to know that you are not alone.
the crackle in your voice
caused by sobbing,
a throat, exhausted by the howling
I know that you are void of all happiness.
I have been there too.
your anger is too full right now,
your sadness is more
cavernous than the oceans combined,
but I am here
my small talk;
my attempts to distract you
from the agony you are feeling,
my venture to convince you that
I am right there beside you
I am trying to let you…
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When she comes
It may be indistinguishable to you
You glance at me
And I smile back in return
Not one dew drop on my skin
You imagine to yourself what kind of life I may have
You imagine the cupcakes I must eat for dinner
You imagine the sugar and spice I must sprinkle on every meal
You imagine the organized perfectly placed items on my desk
The friends I must surround myself with
The laughs I share
The memories I must have accumulated from the amazing life I lead
But you don’t know
You don’t know I’m tormented by something I want to call a she
Because what else could she be
She’s jealous
And controlling
She’s slick
And manipulative
She slithers gracefully
But a bite so poisonous
It creeps so slowly
Like Guillain-Barre
starting from my toes
Nerve by nerve
Muscle weakness
Lung paralysis
I cannot breathe
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I wrote this poem September 27, 2016
I had found a happiness but with the same breath of this poem, and the fear of losing the love, I eventually let my anxiety tear apart what had become amazing.
Don’t you lift me up to drop me…
Don’t you dare fill me to the brim just to knock me over
The time it took to fill me
Drip by drip
Compliment after affection
Good deed after kisses on foreheads
Factor in the evaporation equation
The occasional sip
Don’t you dare resuscitate this dying heart of mine
Just to pull the plug as I dream
As the pressure builds within my chest and the butterflies
Fling themselves against the walls of my thoracic cavity
Please don’t intubate me
When its apparent that I can’t catch my breath
Don’t be afraid that I will detonate as the pressure becomes to strong for me…
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-A boyfriend's Advice On a different post, I will dive into details about my journey with anxiety, but right now I feel like this is a post I really want to make. What I want to say from the start is that, I am also new to anxiety, in the sense that, my awareness of... Continue Reading →
I'm sorry that I hate her With every vein in my body I hate her Innocent bystander To your wrong doings You hurt me Yet here I stand Unwavering By your side when I see her Innocent bystander My blood boils My fists clench My heart drops to the pit of my stomach And I... Continue Reading →
Fraud via Daily Prompt: Fraud We are all liars to some extent Compulsive Manipulative Liars I know I lie Every day That I tell the world that I am okay I lie with every picture that I take The smile As if I'm happy The laugh As if I know laughter The posts... Continue Reading →
I’ve always believed that I had words running through my fingertips like water through a faucet throughout my life, I’ve filled journal after journal and the moment that you stepped into my life I became a blank page one that I could not seem to fill you rendered me speechless... Continue Reading →
how do you know you’re in love? with a head full of jumbled up thoughts and a heart stuffed with tangled emotions where does the thinking stop? where do the feelings begin? to feel as though- as though - and there I go…. not even knowing how to finish that sentence not being able to... Continue Reading →
I was so engulfed in loving you immersed in the idea of us in the idea of you I began to lose the woman I was the woman I AM tossing my interests aside willing to forgo my passions relinquish my pleasures just to be with you now, where am I? not in the literal... Continue Reading →
rediscovering what life is like in a world devoid of your presence unearthing the ability to live a life where not every minute every moment of my day is engrossed in thinking about what you need with you missing from my life you would think my days would feel empty I was terrified that the... Continue Reading →
you may think hell hath no fury like a woman scorned but I tell you it is not the fury you need to be afraid of you may think the hurricane the damage the destruction is what causes your fear your angst your panic but I tell you fear the calm after the storm fear... Continue Reading →
Facing the end of 2017 means a lot of different things to me. I started this journey in 2014, moving to Southern California alone almost on a whim when I got accepted into a nursing program. 2014 was a year of changes for me. It was a year of GIANT decisions. It was a year... Continue Reading →
Does anyone else have a weird quirk about their water bottles? I have always been very picky about my water bottles and I have gone through many, many, many, trials and errors. This topic may be trivial to most, but I went through a long journey to find a "perfect" water bottle. In my twenties,... Continue Reading →
via Daily Prompt: Tame Tame We knew what we were getting into When we set ourselves on the path Of falling in love The stars sang it to be so They said our skulls would be so thick We wouldn’t hear the mumbles coming from each others lips They said we would fight to be... Continue Reading →
via Daily Prompt: Believe Believe The war between what I believe to be true And what my demons whisper Take my faith on a whirlwind roller coaster I am sorry that I hurt you That I take your love And your care That I take your gentle caress And each inch of effort that you... Continue Reading →
Exit to the lost hills it said Eerie it sounds Terrifying to most But somehow My first thought was I’d like to go there How scary could the lost hills be When I’m already lost Inside of me When I’ve been running blind for years There’s comfort in those lost hills Where one is... Continue Reading →
When she comes It may be indistinguishable to you You glance at me And I smile back in return Not one dew drop on my skin You imagine to yourself what kind of life I may have You imagine the cupcakes I must eat for dinner You imagine the sugar and spice I must sprinkle... Continue Reading →
You run rampant Like a storytelling tinker bell Fluttering around my ear Beautiful maleficent The tulle off your tutu Making me sneeze As it grazes my nose But I can't see when I sneeze Eyes closed shut Head down I could crash a car If I sneeze when driving I could trip on the sidewalk... Continue Reading →
I am more than just my pieces Every little broken piece, Every jagged edge A slice of a finger At the touch of my skin I am more than just my pieces I can't yearn for you to glue me together I can not look at you as though your job is to Make me... Continue Reading →
To the girl I met today, I want you to know, that I feel your torment. In the way that you evade my eyes in the way that your eyes gloss over with the pink tinge of a girl that has cried from the full of the moon till it blessed us with... Continue Reading →
I have heard her say day after day how much she loved him I watched her carefully strut her way down the stairs Gentle hands gliding down polished banisters I gazed as I saw her purposely choosing every little morsel of lunch That would go with him that day to work Every ingredient chosen with... Continue Reading →
This was also written on September 27 2016 The end of my last relationship heightened all kinds of insecurities. "why wasn't I good enough? why didn't he want me?" I felt, unattractive, I felt, unwanted. When I found myself on a dance floor and it brought back the feelings of happiness, and loving myself, and... Continue Reading →
I wrote this poem September 27, 2016 I had found a happiness but with the same breath of this poem, and the fear of losing the love, I eventually let my anxiety tear apart what had become amazing. Don’t you lift me up to drop me… Don’t you dare fill me to the brim just... Continue Reading →
