Most Days

Most days 

I do the things I Love 

I seek out the things that make me happy 

I love the people around me that I hold dear 

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Most days 

I dance because I love the music 

I sing because I love the words 

I cry because I feel the passion 

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Most days 

I live my life 

Go from point A to point B 

Grateful for the day I have been given 

Hopeful for tomorrow 

Learning from the memory of my past 

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Most days 

I inhale the beauty that this world places before me 

I exhale the impossibles 

And I get myself to tomorrow 

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But ….. 

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Some days 

I miss the comfort of being able to call you any time of the day 

To hear your voice 

To vent insecurities 

To remind ourselves that we are queens 

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Some days 

I really miss the road trips 

The Cuddles 

And hearing your laughter 

I miss the way your hand held mine 

The way your laughter turned your face red 

And I could barely catch a glimpse of your eyes 

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Some days 

I fear that I will never be able to laugh again 

That I will forever only be able to giggle 

That I will only have enough happiness in me to smile 

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Some days 

I fear that I will never be whole 

Because you are no longer with me 

There will always be a veil of sadness 

There will always be a piece missing 

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Most days, mother

I tell myself that everything happens for a reason 

I find comfort in knowing that you are happy and at peace 

Free of the stress and struggle that the physical world hands us 

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But some days, mother 

My heart breaks from your absence 

My heart aches for the future we will not have together 

For the grandchildren you will not meet 

For the dances we will not dance

Songs we will not sing 

The unfinished dreams that you held in your pocket 

That never got to see the light of day 

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Some days, mother 

I miss you so terribly

I cannot believe that you are not here with me 

But I get myself together

Wipe the tears 

And I make it to tomorrow 

Back To A Time

sifting through a box of old things

Book after book

pamphlet after pamphlet 

treatise on anxiety and depression 

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I am brought back to a time 

when our lives were dictated by school bells 

And seating charts 

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Where one rumor 

Became our entire world 

And one heartbreak 

Was announced through 

The speaker hung walls 

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ages ago

An entire world away 

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I pack it back up 

to look back at another day 

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Weekly prompt @ NSTMP

Soaked In The Salty Air

It smelled of musty air

Saturated in salt

Surrounded by unparalleled darkness

I knew blindly that there was an ocean beside me 

Filled with life  

Housing a world we barely have knowledge of 

I catch a glimpse 

Like a flashlight 

Offering a gift 

The waves crash upon each other 

Beautifully dangerous 

Unabashedly uncaring 

I’m overwhelmed with 

The realization of nature 

It’s strength

It’s determination 

It’s reluctance to be bothered by my presence 

Within the darkness

The ocean, my neighbor

An entire world at my feet

Soaked in the Salty air 

I am energized and fueled by Mother Earth

I am belittled and humbled by her 

And I am thankful